Thursday, April 11, 2013

I haven’t got time for the pain mockers...


A couple of months ago, after a long silence, I posted a new blog for those of you who are starved for entertainment. It had been over a year and I had enough people nudge me into a new post that I thought I should make time to create a new blog again from time to time.

I’ve had a busy couple of months since then. I had the pleasure of performing with some very talented people in “Broadway Meets Lake Benton” at the Opera House back in March. The following day set building and rehearsals began for “Charlie Cox Runs With Scissors.” It has been fun directing a quality group of actors/friends, and despite the obstacles Mother Nature is throwing at us this week while attempting to rehearse, we will open Friday night at 7:30 with a wonderful comedy production. Please come if you can.

Oh yeah, and I started playing with a band again, when I agreed to play bass for the County 7 band.

Throw in the 2013 version of Wilmes Family Board Game Weekend last weekend, and I’ve had trouble finding time to post a follow-up to “Thumbing My Nose at the Pain,” the blog in which I shared the trials of a computer addict getting through the trauma of a paper cut…on the end of my thumb…in mid-winter.

I would like to thank many of you for your support. Here is a sampling of the comments from some of my true friends:

- From regular reader Shirley: Dear Brave Mark, You really “nailed” the source of your pain. I have to “hand” it to you. I definitely give you a “thumbs” up. Continue to be brave. This sojourn will soon be but a distant memory. I certainly won’t “thumb” my nose at you if you, oh I don’t know, won’t be able to do snow removal because of this tragedy. But I do have to comment that you are such a “cut” up. Wishing you well. And for Heaven’s sake, don’t touch them thar insurance papers. They’re out to get ya.
 
- From Ann: Put Super Glue on it - it will heal right up, it takes the pain away, and you can use it...  No really - I'm serious.  Try it. Works every time.

- From a nice reader out in Pierre, SD: "Loved reading this. I carry a little disc of meleluca paste in my purse and have several more around the house. It is great for cuts, burns, sores or anything like that. Takes the soreness out and heals over night. I gave one to the gal who owns the quilt store in Pierre for when she gets a pin prick. The other day I was there and she was using it on a cold sore on her lip, She said it worked great for that. If you know anyone who sells melalueca just have them order you some. There is gel in a tube but the paste works better I think."

 
- From Jeff in Northfield: "Aquifer" or "Triple Paste" will clear up your paper-cut. Be careful...cuts like that would've killed a pioneer....those things hurt like no other. Childbirth? I doubt it comes close, and I'm serious. A & D ointment will also make it feel better, but that Triple Paste really does heal 'er up. (it's mostly for diaper rash, but man it heals up the cuts, too). Just have the ladies try, TRY to hold a guitar pick (with a paper cut on the thumb)! Can't do it!

Then there was George in Tyler, who seemed to be mocking me. You decide:

- I don't believe I have ever been brought to tears by an email before. The pain, the agony, why didn't you call for support? …I will start immediately searching for the perfect get well card to guide you back to norms of healthiness. As I wipe my eyes again, get well soon.

George, however, at least had the common courtesy to thinly veil his lack of sympathy.

There were more than a few women making snarky comments. One of the more stinging communications came from Nicole in Minneapolis, who sent me the “definition” of Man Flu: An illness that causes the male of the species to be helpless and sicker than any other family member. In females; a cold.

If I were a cynic, I would have been thinking that she was implying I was overstating the severity of my injury.

Then I was subjected to this bit of fiction from Angie, one of Nicole’s equally unsympathetic friends (click the link to see the latest in female propaganda):


Obviously conceived of and filmed by a female with an active imagination.

Of course, what makes these things funny is that it is so ridiculous to think that us hunter/gatherers could be so whiny.

We’re tough…we can handle a little misguided ribbing in the name of humor.

That being said, I have to go now. I’m going to see if Triple Paste works on hangnails… Those puppies are nasty.